(Naples, Wine Cafe) What To Do When You Get Scared in Naples

Any given dark, narrow street in Naples

When you are waiting for the world's best pizza place to open and you wander down a dark, narrow street in Naples, you start to get scared.

When you get scared, you start to pretend like you "belong there" and try to blend in.

When you start to blend in, the vacationing Italians will approach you and try to speak to you in Italian whilst pointing at a map.

When they speak Italian and start pointing inquisitively, you don't understand and start to get scared again.

When you start to get scared again, you back away from them into the traffic and almost get run over by a woman and a toddler on a moped. 

When a moped-driving toddler whose mom is riding bitch almost mows you down, you scream and run down Via San Gregorio Armeno past the nativy scenes and leave Gina behind.

When Gina finally catches up to you, she finds you sobbing in a corner of the Piazzetta Divino Amore.

When you stop sobbing in the corner of this miniature piazza, you start to look around.

Safe haven that is Wine Cafe & Piazetta Divino Amore

As you look around, you see that there is a fruit stand, a caffe, a wine bar, and a souvenir store, and that all are located directly across from the Police Commission.  Hooray!  You relax, as it is probably one of the safest places to be in Naples, and it is then that you decide to have something to drink.

Introducing Wine Cafe, an adorable family-run (aren't they all?) wine bar/beer joint/liquor store that features a small indoor bar and a large outside patio surrounded by hedges.

The sweetest, 20-something girl will greet you and bring out some of the coldest, most refreshing beer you've ever tasted, along with a heaping pile of salty potato chips.  If beer isn't your thing, there are plenty of wines to sample along with a full bar.  There is no food, but with the chips in hand, you won't even mind.

Inside, there are bottles of wine and limoncello for sale, in case you decide you want some souvenirs.  For something more authentic, you can venture next door to the souvenir shop where they sell wooden bell wind chimes, small nativies, painted tambourines, and cords of bark, presumably for pizza ovens, for €4.00.

Would you like some wood?

As you sit and enjoy your beverage, you will notice three things:

First, there is graffiti everywhere in Naples.  I recommend spending a few minutes trying to determine which are the bad words, and later try to use them, especially when Italian tourists shove maps in your face.

Via San Gregario Armeno

Second, no one owns a clothes dryer here.  Instead, they hang their laundry outside of the window, and this is very common in all parts of Italy.  Here, somehow it will seem sadder.  Partly because of the fashion, and partly because it is raining today and has been for the past couple of days.  I mean, can you say <insert Italian graffiti word here>?! 

Lastly, and this is best to contemplate about after more than one drink, this WINE BAR is located directly across from the POLICE.  I mean, come on.  What kind of a liquor business owner sets up shop next to the po-po?  Or do you think the family was there first, and was like, "Maria, I heard the worst <insert Italian graffiti word> news today!  You won't believe who is moving into the neighborhood"?  Or is it possible that the rent is just cheaper here?  Do the cops come for a cold one after their shifts or, since this is Italy, during?  I'm just saying.

Okay now, you are ready to venture back out into the wild streets of Naples.  This time, you can meander back up the Via San Gregario Armeno and stop and look at the intricate nativy scenes without fear.  Now you know where the police station is, and where Wine Cafe is, too.

Wine Cafe | Salonone Anna 56, Piazetta Divino Amore, Naples | +06085741210